Mainly For Indian Women

FOR INDIAN WOMEN AROUND 40 YEARS OF AGE 
I lost my husband in my mid - forties after which I had to face many hurdles. It was a traumatic experience  unlike any bad          experience .  I felt left alone.  At that time the memory of the past no longer could be recalled. The body felt weak. Life looked dark. The thought - Should a woman continue in the same condition for   the rest of her life? NO!!!                                                                   

All of life is not over now because of the loss. This part of  life is just a bend in the road called LIFE which needs realignment.  Life  has to  be reset -- fresh goals, fresh decisions, fresh challenges have to be mastered with a renewed dedication  to creator God.

I would like to lay before you a few steps that I've tried and found useful.

1. NEVER   UTTER  NEGATIVE    WORDS : 

 " By the words of your mouth you will be justified or condemned." .( Matt12:37 ) 

" Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight , O Lord,  MY STRENGTH AND MY REDEEMER." ( Ps 19: 14)

Negative words breed negative situations. Positive words breed positive situations.  Be cautious!

2. PICK  UP  T.HE  DISCARDED   THREAD 

Till now cooking , washing, keeping house and going for work was the routine but now the husband's role in the house had to be added 

and handled by one person!

My husband used to do the banking and purchasing for the house.  Now all that had fallen on me.  I decided not to look up to anyone , including my relatives for help except God.  " Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, And He shall bring  it to pass".

 ( Ps 37: 5) He has always been my wisdom , support and strength.

3. REFUSE TO BE BITTER

 My situation at that time I had  no support from relatives whether emotional or financial, I needed to do all the work everyday  24/7 and children's issues were some of the reasons that could have made me bitter.  Bitterness does not help in reaching the goals of life , in fact it damages our mind and body.  Bitterness poisons the body. ( Acts 8: 23 ).  Bitterness defiles a person  (Heb 12:15). It pays not to become bitter!

4. LIVE IN THE PRESENT

Children face more trauma as they cannot understand why their father was taken away.  We should not forget that they would have felt the emptiness though they may not have expressed the depth of their feelings. They need to be reminded that God has a special place in His heart for the fatherless. (  Ps 146:8,9 )

5. YOU ARE NOT ALONE

 I would like to share two incidents from my life. I have a daughter and a son. When my daughter came of marriageable age I started looking for a life partner for her. There was no one  to help in the search for a suitable life partner .My daughter kept rejecting every proposal. It was frustrating because people started saying that I wasn't  smart enough to get her settled. I sought the Lord's face and told Him that I wanted my daughter's marriage to be fixed before she became twenty five years old. The Lord did exactly what I had asked for! After the engagement in three months the marriage took place! The engagement and the marriage went off well. All glory to God!

I would like to tell how I was able to admit my son in the engineering course considering my 'not enough' salary to pay fees. I did not  know the how of admitting my son in the college. God used two colleagues, one to motivate me to seek admission in the college and the other to help me get the admission in the college. All financial requirements were paid . Glory to God!!

6. IT IS SURVIVAL TIME

So dear friend get involved with people. One way is to work outside your home if you are not already employed. It helps in the diversion of mind. Do not withdraw from people , depression may set in.

7 THE FUTURE WILL TURN OUT BETTER THAN EXPECTED. 

My children are happily settled and life is good. I am sure it will be good for you  too.